The precious moments together as we were anointed with oils, holy water and spoke our vows will remain in my heart forever.
Olivia, who was ordained with me shared these words and sentiments that so perfectly express how this new path feels. "They say that all roads lead you back to home. I firmly believe this, as I feel that this new chapter will begin to align me in such a way that it will allow me to feel all those things that resemble the feeling of home.
Home, a place that feels full…that feels alive….a home that I remember from a deep place within my knowing and self. A home that has remained quiet and sleeping all this life and now begins to open its windows to allow new and fresh air to fill its many beautiful rooms."
We were each asked to share a declaration before we spoke our vows. These are the words I shared prior to my ordination as a reverend.
As I was preparing for this next step in my journey, my ordination I have such a sense of coming full circle. It is with humility and thanks to the Divine for bringing me through the troubled waters of ill health, chronic pain and depression, and by showing me that these gifts were given in order to bring me to this amazing place of forgiveness, acceptance and gratitude in my life. By allowing my consciousness to go deep into my suffering, I found myself becoming more attuned to my soul and I began to recognize that my suffering was given to deepen my connection to my spirituality and the Divine.
I have often likened my life to that of a caterpillar encased in its’ chrysalis as I too was waiting for the right moment in my journey to be released. Through the years, realizing small changes, many healings and awakenings I was brought to a spiritual revelation three years ago and my beautiful butterfly was released and took flight.
There are great lessons to be learned from suffering and great gifts to share once accepted. But never allow yourself to fall prey to the notion that you are your suffering. Do not allow suffering to identify who you truly are. And never let suffering snuff out your beautiful inner light.
The Japanese use the art of Kintsugi to mend broken china. By filling the cracks with gold it gives a whole new level of aesthetic beauty to the vessel showing that when something has suffered damage it becomes more beautiful.
Reiki opened a door for me allowing me to experience the healing magnificence of Divine universal energies and now I have come home. Reiki guided me to recognize that there is but one life - that life is God. There is but one mind and one power - that mind and power is God. There is but one love - that love is God. The knowing of this gives me the realization that in God I am divine. God is me, I am God - I simply am. God is life, the wisdom that guides me and the unconditional love that comforts me. Reiki opened my heart to the truly sacred presence of God and I now trust in that love.
Having been raised by a Reformed Baptist reverend and author, I never imagined that I too would walk a similar path one day. My dad’s religious beliefs prevented him from allowing the possibility of any belief outside of his own, so in life he would have condemned my spiritual choices, but tonight I can feel his energy surrounding me with love and pride.
Deep within my soul I have always felt that I was destined to something great, something that would affect many. Slowly it has been revealed to me that I am that greatness, as I share my love, my nurturing and my compassion through Reiki. I look forward to sharing these parts of me as I continue in my volunteer position with seniors; continue to growing my Reiki practice, allowing my intuitive abilities to develop, coaching clients and young Reiki practitioners and allowing my spirituality to naturally flourish. It is my sincere hope that opportunities continue to present themselves that allow me to continue sharing my gift with others.
Throughout this journey so many new skills and gifts continue to manifest themselves, one of which has been co-creating beautiful words through Spirit. I find so many of these words follow intense spiritual experiences and if I may, I would like to share some of my poetry with you.
Home
The pain of the past, simmering just beneath the face she exposed to the world
Always there, churning and bubbling
Destroying her self-esteem, her morals, her thoughts, her abilities
Deeper and deeper they went until she couldn’t recognize herself any longer.
What happened to this woman, what hurts, what pain, what grief?
That left her wanting health, happiness and freedom from the pain
How deep must she dig to release this pain?
Can she find what she seeks?
She experienced abuse, she experienced death; she experienced the loss of a friend
The bite of hatred within her family
All working together to create that fertile ground for negative emotions
Anger, resentment, self-loathing, judgment, bitterness, envy
This girl was good for no one.
But then one day her whole life changed
She was brought to the edge but could she take the next step
What was waiting beyond - forgiveness, acceptance, self-love, humility
Within her reach, yet was she ready to release the past?
The cloaks of grief and depression were wrapped tightly around her
They had her locked within their grips
They comforted her, they eased her pain, protected her from the world
Was she ready to drop these crutches - NO
But deep within she knew she must let them drop from her body
As leaves drop from the trees in autumn.
Shifting, awakening, changing her core, releasing ego, piety, anger, resentment
The pain was moving upwards and outwards - breaking the surface
Her vibrations once so low were now rising; she felt lightness in her soul
She loved, she laughed; she embraced the wholeness of life
Reiki became part of her journey
Introduced to her one winter solstice night
She experienced the pulsing energy and knew she was home
Her searching was done
A new spiritual life was opening to her
The fear of death was gone - replaced with peacefulness
The horror of a cruel God - replaced with a Divine source of unconditional love
She pondered her lives, previously and yet to come
How many lives had she lived, how many more would she live
What gifts had she given, what gifts had she now to offer?
A new life was hers, was within her reach
The hurts were gone, replaced with unconditional all-encompassing love
How did she exist so long unaware - living but not alive?
She would forever be grateful for that winter solstice night
When she felt the energy in that hand on her shoulder
Waking her up, filling her up, freeing her soul
She truly had come home.
Worthy
Her hands gently touch my face
The hands of this beautiful soul sister
I feel the energy flow; slowly at first, then faster, then harder
My body and soul cries out for this energy
Dark, primal thoughts assault my senses
Ancient memories intrude
As past lives float in and out of my consciousness
On a crystal glass lake I drift
I see a woman in a white robe
I am her and she is me
I am floating, I am rocking, I am pulsing,
The energy is soft, the energy is hard
It is gentle, it is everywhere
My dreams are constantly interrupted
As my body tries to clear the blocks
I will myself to control my body's movements
But they are stronger than my will
Muscles jump and my torso spasms
"Let the energies flow" I hear again and again
Now I sense her hands moving through my chakras
They are on me, they are in me; they are going through me
Our hearts beat as one as her soul gently lays on mine
Then the energy explodes through my body opening, releasing
Sweet, pure love is flowing through the hands of this woman I love
I have known her before
We are bound through our life experiences
The love is pulsing and beating to my very core
To the part of me that wants to stay hidden
The part that cries out "heal me"
I am a goddess, I am divine
I am a healer and I have healed through many, many lives
I see again the woman in white robes
We are one
A healer, a priestess, she walks through my mind
I am becoming who I was born to be
But first I must embrace myself - all of me
My spiritual, my emotional and my physical
Embrace my feminine self, my sensuality
Release the guilt, the deep dark parts of me
The parts I keep secret
Acknowledge, accept and release my shame
Lovingly accept all of me
Forgiving myself as I continue my healing journey
Towards this magnificent woman
In love with herself and her life
And always remembering - I am worthy.
The pain of the past, simmering just beneath the face she exposed to the world
Always there, churning and bubbling
Destroying her self-esteem, her morals, her thoughts, her abilities
Deeper and deeper they went until she couldn’t recognize herself any longer.
What happened to this woman, what hurts, what pain, what grief?
That left her wanting health, happiness and freedom from the pain
How deep must she dig to release this pain?
Can she find what she seeks?
She experienced abuse, she experienced death; she experienced the loss of a friend
The bite of hatred within her family
All working together to create that fertile ground for negative emotions
Anger, resentment, self-loathing, judgment, bitterness, envy
This girl was good for no one.
But then one day her whole life changed
She was brought to the edge but could she take the next step
What was waiting beyond - forgiveness, acceptance, self-love, humility
Within her reach, yet was she ready to release the past?
The cloaks of grief and depression were wrapped tightly around her
They had her locked within their grips
They comforted her, they eased her pain, protected her from the world
Was she ready to drop these crutches - NO
But deep within she knew she must let them drop from her body
As leaves drop from the trees in autumn.
Shifting, awakening, changing her core, releasing ego, piety, anger, resentment
The pain was moving upwards and outwards - breaking the surface
Her vibrations once so low were now rising; she felt lightness in her soul
She loved, she laughed; she embraced the wholeness of life
Reiki became part of her journey
Introduced to her one winter solstice night
She experienced the pulsing energy and knew she was home
Her searching was done
A new spiritual life was opening to her
The fear of death was gone - replaced with peacefulness
The horror of a cruel God - replaced with a Divine source of unconditional love
She pondered her lives, previously and yet to come
How many lives had she lived, how many more would she live
What gifts had she given, what gifts had she now to offer?
A new life was hers, was within her reach
The hurts were gone, replaced with unconditional all-encompassing love
How did she exist so long unaware - living but not alive?
She would forever be grateful for that winter solstice night
When she felt the energy in that hand on her shoulder
Waking her up, filling her up, freeing her soul
She truly had come home.
Worthy
Her hands gently touch my face
The hands of this beautiful soul sister
I feel the energy flow; slowly at first, then faster, then harder
My body and soul cries out for this energy
Dark, primal thoughts assault my senses
Ancient memories intrude
As past lives float in and out of my consciousness
On a crystal glass lake I drift
I see a woman in a white robe
I am her and she is me
I am floating, I am rocking, I am pulsing,
The energy is soft, the energy is hard
It is gentle, it is everywhere
My dreams are constantly interrupted
As my body tries to clear the blocks
I will myself to control my body's movements
But they are stronger than my will
Muscles jump and my torso spasms
"Let the energies flow" I hear again and again
Now I sense her hands moving through my chakras
They are on me, they are in me; they are going through me
Our hearts beat as one as her soul gently lays on mine
Then the energy explodes through my body opening, releasing
Sweet, pure love is flowing through the hands of this woman I love
I have known her before
We are bound through our life experiences
The love is pulsing and beating to my very core
To the part of me that wants to stay hidden
The part that cries out "heal me"
I am a goddess, I am divine
I am a healer and I have healed through many, many lives
I see again the woman in white robes
We are one
A healer, a priestess, she walks through my mind
I am becoming who I was born to be
But first I must embrace myself - all of me
My spiritual, my emotional and my physical
Embrace my feminine self, my sensuality
Release the guilt, the deep dark parts of me
The parts I keep secret
Acknowledge, accept and release my shame
Lovingly accept all of me
Forgiving myself as I continue my healing journey
Towards this magnificent woman
In love with herself and her life
And always remembering - I am worthy.
Deep within my soul there is a sense, an intuition,
something I cannot ignore or resist and I hear the words to step forward and
accept this new challenge in serving the Divine. Living my truths, sharing and
speaking them is the next step in my journey that I am being guided to take.
While I was preparing and meditating on these
truths, I could see the face of God in my mind's eye and was given these words,
"Step forward in your truth, own it, speak it and bring it to others with
your loving compassion".
So tonight I humbly bow in reverence, and as I
speak my vows to receive this honor, I will celebrate by vowing to each of you
present, that I will hold myself to a higher standard and give nothing less
than the very best I have to offer.
I will strive to live my life in such a way that
others will see and be drawn to my energy as I share my love and light wherever
this journey takes me.
Namaste
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